Apr. 12th, 2010

Road Block

Apr. 12th, 2010 01:02 pm
marenzi: ([SPN] Impala Sex)
I completely disappeared for the last week for no real reason. It was spring break and I had plans to go spend a week drunk off my ass in Panama City with a couple of the frats, but then that Thursday two of the guys I was rooming with had a huge fight because one slept with the other's girlfriend and then they weren't going and then we couldn't fill the room in 24 hours so the rest of the room couldn't go either. Life's bitchy like that sometimes.

So I drove the 700+ miles home and promptly determined that I am not going to be able to live at home this summer and keep my sanity. IDK, guys, I know this is probably just me being a whiny teenager, but my mom and I get along so much better when we're several states apart. For all intents & purposes, I'm really living without any supervision here; the RAs & housing staff don't care what we're doing as long as no one's getting hurt. It's just frustrating to go home and immediately revert to being twelve with a ten o'clock curfew. Yes, I know I don't have a life there. It'd just be nice to pretend.

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Haha, I can't even imagine going back to being twelve. I was still living in Idaho and going to a school I loved and surrounded by some of the best people I've ever met, all of whom I'd known since we were five. I had no idea that my dad would lose his job and my mom would be diagnosed and we'd have to move to DC, so I was pretty happy back then. If I could see myself now... I'm probably at the happiest point in my life here at college, despite all of the stress and drama, because I love what I'm doing and I've made a place here. Those six years in between were pretty miserable, but it's interesting that these are the two high points of my life so far.

To actually answer the question, an amusing mixture of both. I'd be horrified that I wasn't studying English to become a ~real writer~, which I wanted since I was three, and I probably wouldn't be all that pleased with the drinking and partying and sex, but twelve-year-old me was very very sheltered. (Okay, I still sort of am, shut up.) I've gotten past that now. ;) But overall, I think I'd be okay with my life, which is nice to realize.

Also, there's a pretty important episode of a pretty awesome show airing this week! (No spoilers, please!) I rather like the relevancy of this icon, although unfortunately Jared Padalecki hasn't worked up the nerve to actually ask me to fuck on the Impala yet. Jensen's probably taking up all his time, that bitch. ♥

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